Being romantic is wonderful and all, but unfortunately, we all make mistakes that can undo all of our romantic efforts. Not to mention, possibly undo the relationship! For instance, every couple has disagreements and sometimes the argument will have a definitive outcome. The spouse that was right has two choices when winning- he/she can simply move on or express understanding as to why there may have been some confusion. Or, he/she can gloat and make their spouse feel inferior and maybe even humiliated. One way works (moving on) and one doesnt (gloating.) Conflict is often unavoidable when two people from different backgrounds with different beliefs are brought together. If you happen to be the one in a disagreement who doesnt come out as the right one, the worst thing you can do is to pout. Its simply childish, not sexy at all, and your partner will most likely have a difficult time finding respect for you as a result. While worry is a natural part of life, dont let it overwhelm your relationship. Wouldnt you rather focus on much more positive things like romance? If you find that you and your spouse schedule a lot during the week, sit down together and try to eliminate some commitments. Dont over-schedule any time that you dont have to, like weekends and vacation days. Make choices that benefit both you and your spouse. Instead of turning on the television, ask your husband or wife if they would like to play a board game or go for a walk. If you decide to watch television together, never give away the ending of a movie! (That is a surefire way to cause some problems!) Try to support your spouses authority in front of the children. If you disagree about what was done, wait until you can talk quietly with your spouse and discuss how things may have been done differently. They can always go back and change their mind or you may eventually come to support his or her decisions. Make as much as possible in your relationship about us instead of about I or you. This doesnt mean that you have to sacrifice your individuality; it simply means that all decisions and thoughts about the relationship should be about both persons needs instead of your own. For instance, if you happen to sleep with someone who hogs the bed covers, go out and find an extra large blanket so theres plenty for both to share. Dont make an issue out of it - make a joke and provide a solution. Show your spouse that you are a loving and mature individual by doing mature and loving things like never holding grudges or continuously bringing up errors from the past. You can also be a good listener, never interrupt, and wait your turn. And most importantly, dont allow a day to pass by without telling your spouse that you love them. |
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