"What are you looking at?" "What?" Furrowed brow followed by an uncontrolled bellow of expletives or worse! Flying debris, maybe, slamming doors. Have you ever found yourself in the midst of a potentially dangerous situation? Have you ever been on the receiving end of a flying ashtray? Or have YOU been violent or violently angry? Anger has been increasing in recent years and violent behavior has been on the rise. This past year, my home city experienced a record number of murders and people are asking "Why?" Good question but not one with an easy answer. Anger begins as an individual attitude or feeling and it is compounded when a similar attitude or feeling crosses its path. Anger needs to be dealt with on an individual basis. The way to combat a rise in anger and a rise in violence is to deal with individuals one at a time. Clergy, parents, teachers, counselors and psychologists need to begin teaching a combination of things from a change in attitude to a change in diet and exercise. It is all so very complicated but each group has a function and each group has a responsibility to society to teach and learn. What I want to concentrate on is the exercise and attitude adjustment. As a parent of a self professed angry 17 year old, I want to share with you what I believe is my responsibility to my daughter and society at the same time. The 3 most important things, in my opinion when dealing with anger in your teenager is: 1. Getting enough sleep Staying up late and not getting sufficient rest is not "cute" or "just a phase" it is a serious issue and for a teen it can be the beginning of trouble. Especially when society is teaching them that caffeine(like these new "energy drinks") can help you get through the day. No wonder kids start using methamphetamines and other uppers in their teens. Find a way for your teen to sleep normally. Night sleeping (at least 8 hours) and day school is still the best way to go. But with all of the tv shows and computer chats and video games, it is almost impossible to get your teens to sleep regularly. 2. Getting enough to eat Now I'm not talking about snacks or macaroni and cheese. I'm talking about vegetables and fruit and helping them to control the intake of caffeine and sugar late in the day. 3. Getting enough exercise It is vitally important in this day and age to have your teens moving so that at bedtime they are physically tired. I know the later it gets the more wired my daughter gets. I never see her go to bed anymore. I have to get up for work at 4:30 am and my daughter is sometimes just going to bed when I get up. And that's on a school day! Now these things won't happen overnight, especially when you haven't enforced them from the beginning. However it needs to be done and in the coming issues I will share with you what my daughter and I do to handle this problem. This is not an exact science but a learning and growing for both of us. You see, even though I've been a teen before and she hasn't, I've never been the father of a teen. So in a way we are both learning together for the first time. I know we both love each other so we will begin with that and move forward. |
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