Most men don't know when they are in love. A lot of times when guys start hanging out with a young lady they are so thrilled to be doing so that they mistake a new friendship for something else. And if you are a guy who moves from relationship to relationship, or has multiple relationships at the same time it is even harder to know if you love someone. Guys who don't get to have so many relationships, or, they haven't been in a relationship for a while may think they are falling in love when they meet someone new when in fact, they are not. The desire for companionship with a woman may override the senses. If you are not careful you could allow the relationship to lead to sex. Once this happens it becomes difficult to judge correctly what your feelings are. Once you engage in sex, the sex itself becomes the motivation or foundation of the relationship before you have determined if you actually could love this person. The longer you engage in this practice the harder it becomes to distinguish your feelings. Other things come into play as well. Guilt and feelings of obligation make it hard for you to be honest about the way you feel. This is because your feelings do become clearer the longer you stay in the relationship. Consider yourself lucky if after a while you find that you are in love. Then you don't have to lie about your feelings. You only have to hope she has come to love you too. Why would you lie about your feelings? You don't want to hurt her feelings. You feel guilty about having lead her on all these months. You have already been having sex so you feel like you are obligated to stay in the relationship. If you are a guy who has multiple sexual relationships going at once consider yourself screwed. It may feel like fun right now but eventually you will get caught. And you will get caught right at the time you decide that you love one of them. Only it will be to late because she has found out about your other relationships and she wont have you either. Why is it so much trouble when you figure out you have fallen in love with one of your sex partners? For starters if she was willing to give it up to you before marriage or, within a few days of meeting, she could probably give it to others as well - just like you. Secondly, the same thing that happens anytime sex comes into play before love and marriage - confusion about your feelings. And since you have multiple sexual relationships going it is even harder to determine your feelings. We were not meant to have multiple partners or wives. It is not a cultural thing either. It may seem to be working in certain cultures but, if you look closely you will find misery somewhere because of this type of relationship. Even in cultures where this is practiced you will find that multiple wives add a lot of misery for one man. Read some bible stories. If you want a clear chance of knowing when you fall in love time is your friend. Abstinence is your friend. These two elements will make it possible for you to determine with some accuracy whether you are compatible, whether you have chemistry, and whether you really are falling in love with someone. To let anything else other than friendship and simple dating occur will only confuse you. This is the only way to ensure that you are falling in love for the right reasons. Maybe you think it can't happen this way. Perhaps you don't think that people live this way anymore. It's just those stuffy, so called Christian bunch. Well even we blow it a lot of the time. But I stand by what I say. You want to know whether or not you are with the right girl? You want to know if you even feel like being in love? You want peace in your life? Time is you friend. I realize that this is not the way people do it today but look at all the misery in marriages and relationships. We must be doing something wrong. |
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