Then of course, baby comes and grows into a toddler and then a teenager and it has all gone wrong. It has been a nightmare from day one. Your relationship has been wrecked because there was never any time for it. You were always full time trying to control those kids and just get through each day alive and still sane. Who can satisfy the needs of a partner with all that pressure every day. There is no hope of having a fulfilling love life when one gets to bed totally exhausted after a day of chasing wild kids around. And so as our kids get older and more uncontrollable our relationship disintegrates into complete chaos. No need for all this hassle. You can still be the best parent on the block if you want to be. Mind you it will take a little work but you will find it will be less work than you are doing now and you will be much, much happier and your family will be pulling together again. Depending how far along you are in your parenting it will be easy to turn it all around. If you read the previous article on baby's first day home you will have found the foundation for happy parenting. Let your baby adjust to your lifestyle and not the other way round. Same goes for toddlers. You have already started the good work and developed that relationship with your kids so just carry it on. Your youngster is old enough now to understand right from wrong but will always choose wrong. Why is that. It can be explained but is a whole article on it's own. There is only one rule now that you have to follow. See, it is going to be easy after all. That rule is, 'always do what you say'. That is it. Nothing more, nothing less. Sound to good to be true. Remember, your youngster is very smart and will soon see through you if you are not sincere in any way. How many times do you see in the supermarket a mother telling her youngster to stop that or they will get a smack. They rarely ever get that smack and only the threat and they know it so will take no notice at all. You as a parent have no credibility with your child. How does that make you feel. So if you follow the rule and if you say it do it you will gain respect from your youngster. It will mean work because you will have to get up and go do what you said you would but you have to do it every time. Your youngster will soon realize that you mean what you say and will respect you for it. When your youngster respects you then you can build your relationship with him based on that respect. You are the parent and he must realize his place in the family. he will push at the boundaries of that family place but if you are strong and maintain that respect he will develop well. Because you see, if your child has no boundary to push against, then he is like a ship with no rudder lost in a mighty ocean. He can never grow to proper maturity without his boundaries set and that respect he has for you as his parent. He deserves the best parent. You can be the best parent. Try it and you will see how things will change. Catch you..Nick |
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