Everyone who is passionate about being a business owner or moving up needs and wants a mentor. Maybe there is someone you know or you just know of who can help you to take your life to the next level. How can you get that person to happily share their wisdom with you to help you get on the right path? How can you rise above the rest so that person wants to give you extra help? I've been a mentor to certain people for years, but never more intensively than in the last four years as a marketing trainer and coach and now as a published author of my book, "Testosterone-Free Marketing." This article will help you to know how to approach a mentor in a way that will make that person more positively pre-disposed to helping you succeed. Read these tips and go find your mentor. Take an interest in the person as a human being. I have an Internet mentor who makes millions of dollars a year. After I ask a question I always ask him about whats going on in his life, share a joke or tell him something funny thats happened to me. For example yesterday I wrote him and after asking a question I typed, Tomorrow Im speaking in a seminar, so right now Im sitting in my hotel room catching up on emails with hair dye on top of my head. He wrote back that he laughed so hard he almost fell off his chair. You dont have to tell your whole life story, but make yourself real and make it light and fun. Dont say, Id like to pick your brain. My brain done been picked dry and I start feeling bored when I hear those words. I know the time I spend with that person will be an interrogation. Instead say something like, I would genuinely value your opinion. Its gentler and I get the sense that it will be a more pleasant conversation rather than an interrogation with harsh lights shining down. Dont try to monopolize a lot of your mentors time at first. Connect in a way thats quick and easy. Dont invite them to a dinner that will be a two hour time commitment. If youre at a seminar they probably have meetings scheduled. If its at home, they probably want some down-time. Offer to drive them to the airport or share a cab. Ask what they like in their coffee or tea and get 15 quality minutes. That may be all you need. Be clear about what youre doing and what you need. There is so much mucky thinking in the world. Im amazed people feel they have to write five pages to express one idea. That means you dont really know what youre talking about. Develop a clear "elevator speech" and mission statement. Think about one or two specific questions you need answered and consider your words and how to ask those questions clearly. Listen, listen, listen to what they say. Dont think about all the reasons why you cant. Thats part of the reason why youre not there yet. Say, Im dealing with yada, yada, yada how would you suggest overcoming those obstacles?" Dont say, Im looking for a mentor. Its easy to deflect a statement like this and not make a commitment with a smile. Instead say, Would it be okay with you if we connected by email or on the phone once in awhile to get your opinion. It would be hard to say no to a simple request like that. Thank the person for their time. Tell them what youre going to do and then when you take action, be sure to let them know what youre doing. Always, always, always tell them when you take an action step. Reciprocate once in awhile. If you see a great article you think they would enjoy send it with a quick note. If you have a trade or a skill and can offer to help them out in some way offer it. Dont say, How can I help you? Then they have to figure it out. Say, Im really very good at _____. If you ever need _____ give me a call, Ill be more than happy to help out any way I can. Even if they never take you up on it, they will appreciate that you offered. Learn to make the link between cause and effect. Dont put your mentor in a position where he/she has to figure it all out for you. Youre not a baby. A mentor is not supposed to take you by the hand every step of the way. They point you in the right direction and you take it from there. Look in the dictionary under mentor. Its all about giving you some guidance as youre on your way. Your job is to make the link between what you are told and how you apply it to your life. A coach is someone you pay for to take you by the hand and hold you accountable. |
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